50 and beyond

Two weeks ago, my mom-in-law (MIL) suffered a mild stroke.

I was away for a short getaway when it happened and was fortunate to have sis-in-law handle the situation. The situation was not dire and so, I didn’t have to cut short my holiday.

I felt somewhat anxious when I returned and started venting it on my kids during a drive to the hospital for my first visit after my return. I berated them for not doing enough. They protested profusely.

While waiting for my turn to go up to see MIL in the ward (only two visitors allowed at one go), my sis-in-law called me to update me on what happened while I was away. She praised my two sons for stepping up and taking over when she had to return to work after the inital days. She described in detail how my older son had checked in with the doctor on the diagnosis and treatment, and how he had ferried my helper and his cousin amidst a busy schedule. She described how my younger son had made his way to the hospital after school, hosted the family friends who visited and checked on the status of the MRI scan my MIL was supposed to go for.

I was surprised and extremely happy to hear her testimony. I had no idea and my boys didn’t tell me any of this…so typical of boys, right? Anyway, they forgave me for being so harsh on them earlier and even let me hold their hands and walk in public when we went to have dinner thereafter. It’s been ages since they let me hold their hands in public. 😆

MIL was discharged from hospital after four nights. She now has slurred speech and can’t really hold a utensil well with her right hand. We have to make the liquids she drinks more viscous to prevent choking, to minimise rish of pneumonia. We are in the midst of arranging for speech and rehab therapy and arranging for a new daycare centre more suited to her needs.

Our family is adjusting to the changes. Hubby and I haven’t been able to attend church yet the past two Sundays. It takes a lot of effort to get MIL ready in the mornings. Then, there is the arduous journey just walkng her to the front door, putting on her shoes and getting into the car. All that is mentally exhausting for Hubby and I, and physically exhausting for MIL. This could be a new season in our lives where we need to stay home on Sundays. Well, taking one step at a time.